A Place Women Can Get Answers From Men

Welcome to Ask Mason!

For years I have listened to female friends of mine complain about guys and ask for my advice over and over again. As a guy, a lot of their problems are simple for me to diagnose but women just don't understand men like they should. I have been giving advice to women for years and now this is your chance to ask me anything. Don't hold back.

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Wednesday, April 2, 2008

Booty Call Bad Boy

Mason,

I met a guy and we talked for a little bit and then we started hooking up. It was never a big deal, we would hang out at his place with his friends and then I would sleep there a couple nights a week. We have a lot of mutual friends but we never hang out no matter how many times I try to make plans with him. He is either staying home or has plans. I don't want to be pushy and bug him all the time but I am starting to like the guy and I just want to hang out with him more. We talk almost everyday but never hang out. He does have a lot of friends though and is always doing stuff so I don't know what to think. He calls me when he is done with his plans which usually involves drinking and then I'll come over and we will hang out but we don't hook up every time so its not so much a booty call. I want something more from him though and I don't know how to get that.

-In Like


In Like,

Sounds like you let yourself become the booty call. Why would he hang out with you if he is already getting what he wants from you? It makes no sense. If he wanted what you wanted then he would try to hang out with you, no matter how many friends or how many plans he has. Guys make an effort when they truly start liking a girl and until you see an effort then I wouldn't get too attached. If you aren't seeing an effort from him then give him that same lack of effort and STOP BEING THE BOOTY CALL. When he calls at night to hang out then don't answer, or answer and tell him that if he really wants to hang out then you guys can hang out (insert time and place here) and set a date. No girl deserves to be strung along as a booty call by a guy that they are developing feelings for. If this continues then you should just stop talking to him, you will get hurt in the short run. You are missing great guys every day that you still try to make something happen with him.


-Mason Stanley

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

This is my exact situation right now. Thanks. I know what my response will be tonight!

EmeraldSwitch said...

Thanks LOTS Mason,
You are the best. I am so a booty call I know it but it is so hard to stop. I love the heat we make together but hurt so bad cause I only see him in bed. He talks to his girls while i'm lying there with him and he texts and stuff. He'll stop if i tell him to but the point is he never answers my calls, he never returns my calls, he only calls after the fun with friends are done. He never returns texts or texts anymore. He can't even answer simple questions. SO PAINFUL!! I am on my 7th try to quit him.

Mason Stanley said...

Oh ya, it is horrible for girls to be in that situation. Guys can make sex a purely physical thing and it's not that easy for girls. A huge part of sex for women is emotional which is not entirely true for guys and that is how the booty calls start and girls get their little hearts broken.

Anonymous said...

This is actually my exact situation. For a little while, I was confused because we started off as a hook up, and I did not expect anything from him. I started getting phone calls from him, and I started talking to him for hours at a time. Then we started hanging out on a weekly basis which would always end up with either me sleeping over or him sleeping over. After a couple of months, he went to another state for the summer, so I thought it was over. He still atleast called once or twice a week and we talked. i actually lost my virginity to him, and I feel like once that happened he stopped calling as much. Once he came back from his summer, he didnt call, or reply to my texts, except once when I was sick. He did that for two weeks, and I realized I might have just been his booty call. Then I just got mad, and stopped talking to him. Then we talked things out and he said he has just been busy and he apologizes. We havent talked too much in the past month, except recently. I actually got back with my ex boyfriend in that month just to realize he was cheating for the second time, and the very next night hooked up with the other guy. BAD DECISION. I told him it was a mistake and it can not happen again. Lately, we have been talking a lot lately, but I had to once again lay down the rules. I have made a lot of bad decisions in the past year, and was not going to repeat them again. Im not sure if he wants me to be the booty call or if he wants something more? He said he not once saw me as a slut in the past 7 months, and not many people know the true him. He somehow just feels comfortable joking around with me and being his self. At one time, its like he might want something, but another time its like im a booty call. i dont know.

Anonymous said...

Thank you, Mason.

I'm a booty call. Have been for months. But I was raped by a different guy last month (he's in jail now but that's a different story). Now the guy that I was the booty call for is pushing sex again. I keep telling him I'm not ready or saying I'm busy. He says he likes me and he just wants to make me feel good. But I didn't like having sex with him and I'm not ready for sex after being raped.